I Believe Life Goes On

Posted in WPSU’s This I Believe, 2010-03-04

It’s 2001. I’m 10 years old, and my heart is breaking. I’ve just been told my father’s car caught on fire. He’s very badly burnt and might not make it.

As a hopeful ten year old, I was praying my dad would stick around. But he didn’t make it. My dad died that year on November 5th.

I pretty much am my dad -- same eyes, nose, mouth, curly hair, and build; same sense of humor, artistic talents, interests, and intelligence. He was my best friend, and he loved me unconditionally.

I felt like my dad left me all alone when he died. But as terrible as it was to lose a parent, I had supportive friends and family to pull me through. To keep myself occupied, I took an interest in art and music and excelled in school. I never forgot my father, but I came away from his the loss with the belief that life goes on. And I moved on with it.

Then, when I was 13 years old, my heart broke all over again. I came home from sled riding and received, yet again, earth shattering news. My grandmother told me my mother had committed suicide. It was December 18th… a week before Christmas.

I’m nothing like my mom. I don’t have the same interests or talents. I don’t look like her-except for my big gummy smile. But despite our differences, my mother and I were really close. She was an amazing mom, and losing her was extremely difficult.

At the time, I felt like the world was stopping, or at least that it should. Something was missing from every holiday. Birthdays were lonely. Sometimes I got depressed. I felt like the whole world should be mourning with me. But the world didn’t share my loss. Instead, my remaining family and I mourned together. We mourned for a long time, but eventually we moved on.

Now I’m a senior in high school. I’ve accomplished a lot of things I know my parents would be proud of. I’ve been on the honor roll every semester, and I’m taking college honors classes while I’m still in high school. I’ve submitted works to the school art show every year. For my Senior project, I made all the decorations for last year’s prom. Even though losing my parents was devastating, it’s made me who I am today. Some days I still grieve, but I’ve pulled through. I’ve become the best person I can be, and I’m stronger than a lot of people I know.

I don’t know if I’m a better person than I would have been if they were still here, but my parents’ death has definitely put a lot in perspective for me. I find it easier to get through everyday setbacks than most. I know from experience that the world will keep turning. The best advice I could ever give, is don’t let tragedies hold you back.

I believe, that no matter what, life goes on.

Comments